What Can Happen In Nine Months?
by MrPresident
Summary: Xander returns from a nine month job in China.
1. The Return

WHAT CAN HAPPEN IN NINE MONTHS?  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own nor have rented anything to do with Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series. I do however have a nice collection of 19th century wooden spoons that I have prepared to let out for a reasonable sum of money, offers on the back of a postcard please.  
  
Background: This story is set after the series finale but with one minor difference. Sunnydale was not destroyed.  
  
CHAPTER ONE - THE RETURN  
  
Xander stepped off the bus. He was home. He was back in Sunnydale. Six months had passed since he had last stepped foot in this town. Nine long months. Xander had changed; for starters he now possessed a formidable beard. Kind of like a cross between Santa Claus and old Canadian lumberjack. He had left nine months ago almost to the day to go work in China. It was hard work but it paid well, very well. His construction company had been contracted to built a series of dams across the Yangtze River. It was the opportunity of a lifetime and he hadn't regretted going one bit but he was glad to be home. He missed America. He missed Sunnydale. He missed his friends. During his time in China he had met lots of people, beautiful women, more beautiful women, and those old wise Chinese guys that he didn't understand a word of what they said, but he hadn't met anyone like his friends from Sunnydale. They were special to him. They were his family. However, as I would expect, contacting America from the deep dark heartland of rural China is quite a task, hell, contacting the rest of China from there is difficult at the best of times. He hadn't spoken to his friends for quite a period of time, nine months to be precise. They didn't even know that he was back in Sunnydale. He had considered calling them from LAX but decided the surprise would be too good to spoil. He liked surprises.  
  
So he found himself standing on an anonymous street in an anonymous Californian town feeling glad to be home. It turned out he quite liked the Californian accent. He liked it so much he came to miss it. But now it was all around him and he was loving it. He felt like hugging the next guy who walked past him. He didn't. He hadn't been away that long.  
  
Meanwhile across town in an average suburban house the age-old struggle continued as it shall continue long after it's current players are gone. "Hey! I've got the remote. That means I choose what we watch." "That's so unfair!" A blonde girl had a small black rectangle object in her hand, which she held gloriously above the two other girls in the room. A young brunette stared on with fire in her eyes and TV guide in her hand, while a redheaded woman lay curled up in a sofa. "Anyway, who died and make you king?" Asked Dawn. Buffy looked confused for a moment before responding, "I did." Dawn realised what she had said, "Oh, yeah." She struggled to regain her place in the argument, "Yeah, well, I want to watch it!" She knew she sounded like a spoilt rich kid but she didn't care. Buffy was acting so damn unreasonable.  
  
Xander approached the house that he had spent so much of his life in. Good times, bad times, and late night movies. This house had seen them all. For some reason he hesitated on the curb outside the house. His heart started to beat like he had just run a marathon. His palms sweated like he was on a first date with that hot chick he had met on the plane. What was he so nervous about? This was Buffy, Willow and Dawn. They were his friends. They were his family. Despite that a wave of uneasiness cascaded over him. A lot could happen in nine months. What if they had changed? What if everything had changed? What if he had changed? He thought for a minute. He didn't feel like he had changed. He didn't feel any different, apart from the beard of course. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a slight movement in the curtains of a house across the street. He had better not loiter any longer. What would the neighbours think? Maybe he had changed. Maybe he had changed into a 1950s housewife. Jesus Christ! He had gone all the way to China on his own but he couldn't walk the ten yards to the front door. What sort of a man was he? He should just walk up to the door and knock. Just walk up and knock. Oh, for the love of God, just walk damn it! He walked.  
  
Inside the house the argument had continued and turned ugly. There was hair pulling, name-calling and improper use of a lifestyle magazine but thankfully everything had calmed down. Willow had acted as peacekeeper and put on the mutually acceptable E! Entertainment network and a show called Hollywood's Hottest Hook-ups. It was at number 23 in the countdown when there came a knock at the door. The three girls looked at each other. None of them had been expecting anyone. "Dawn, answer that, would you?" Commanded Buffy. Dawn's face became a picture of annoyance, "Me?!?" She shrieked. "Why me?" Before Buffy could answer, Willow, feeling the return of conflict, stood up and said, "I'll get it." Satisfied the two Summers' girls went back to the television and a series of clips of Matt Damon and Minnie Drivers. Willow reluctantly tore herself away from the screen and made her way to the door. She reached the handle, turned it, and opened the door, and her mouth dropped. 


	2. The Welcome

CHAPTER TWO - THE WELCOME  
  
"Xander."  
  
The words sounded so empty to Willow. All her emotions had been replaced by shock. She had no feeling to put into her voice. Xander was standing before her. Xander. Her best friend. The boy she had spent practically her entire childhood with. He was her first love. He was Xander and he was standing in front of her. She had thought he was in China doing some building stuff. He had left soon after they buried Anya. He had called it the opportunity of a life but they all knew that he was running away. But they didn't try to stop him. The only girl he had ever loved had just died, if anyone had the right to run away it was him. When he didn't call they put it down to him needing space. Then a month passed by, then two, then three, then half a year was gone and nothing. They began to consider the possibility that he might never come back. Another month passed, the another, then another and the possibility no one wanted to accept became the answer that no one could avoid. But now he was standing right in front of her. Xander was standing in front of her and what's more he had grown the most horrible bushy frontiery beard she had ever seen.  
  
"Hi, Will. I'm back." There was no ceremony in his voice. No rejoicing, no celebration, just a subdued relief.  
  
"Xander." Repeated Willow. She hadn't blinked since opening the door as if fearful he might suddenly vanish. "You're back."  
  
Xander shuffled his feet and gave a little uncomfortable smile, "Yeah."  
  
From inside the house Buffy had grown increasingly curious about Willow's behaviour. She was standing open mouthed at the front door as if she had seen a ghost or something. Or something? Something like a vampire! Buffy leaped up from her chair and rushed over to the door, violently drew it fully open and stared in disbelief. It was Xander. It was Xander! Xander was back!  
  
"You're back." She said in an excited tone. The sort of tone a kids use when they finally unwrap a Christmas present they actually want. "And you've got a beard."  
  
Xander's hand instinctively reached up to his beard and he began to caress it like the wise old Chinese guys he had seen. "Yeah." He smiled again. The same uncomfortable smile as before.  
  
Now it was Dawn's turn to become curious at the behaviour of those at the front door. She managed to draw herself away from the hypnotic images of celebrity couples to walk over towards the door. She saw Willow and Buffy open mouthed and wide-eyed staring at whoever had just knocked.  
  
"Hey guys. Who is it?" No response. She moved closer. "Guys?" Still no response. Now she was at the edge of the door. She reached out and gently pushed it out of her view. It was Xander. He had returned and he was looking hot! More hot then she remembered. Well, maybe the beard wasn't the best look for him. But still.damn! He looked good. A lust descended over Dawn's eyes. "You're back." She said in her best sultry voice.  
  
Xander gave her a strange look as if he had just noticed something he wasn't quite sure of and smiled the uncomfortable smile again. "Hey Dawnie."  
  
For a period of about fifteen seconds nobody spoke. There was complete silence. Willow stared at Xander, Buffy stared at Xander, Dawn stared at Xander and Xander felt the eyes of the three girls staring at him. Finally he had had enough.  
  
"You don't suppose I could come in, could I? It's kind of cold out here." He wasn't exactly sure whose permission he should be getting so he directed his request at all three.  
  
They all responded. Between the confusing overlapping three-way chatter Xander was apologised to twice, invited inside three times and complimented on his beard not at all. He was offered a drink, a snack, a seat and something, under Dawn's breath, that it's best not to repeat here. When all were sitting comfortably the questions began. Where had he been? What had he done? Who had he met? Why hadn't be called? Had something terrible happened? Did they really teach people to catch flies with chopsticks? Xander answered all their questions. He told them of his trip out to China with the thoroughly enjoyably stopover in Hawaii. He told them of the mud tracks that they had to drive heavy equipment through, which got so flooded they could swim quite easily on them. He told them of the beautiful mountains and unbelievably expansive plains. He told them of the delights of the local people, though he left out the most popular delight amongst his men. He talked until they had no more questions to ask him and the grip of sleep had become to have its effect. Willow took a very sleepy Dawn upstairs and Buffy brought out a blanket and pillow for Xander. He thanked her and settled down on the couch. Buffy watched him for a second with her head cocked slightly to one side. Then she moved towards the stairs. She paused at the light switch and said in almost a whisper, "It's nice to have you back." Then she turned off the light and was gone. This left Xander trying to find which position caused him the least amount of time. After a minute or so of manoeuvring he stopped and just lay there. A small ray of light entered the room from a streetlight across the road via a crack in the curtains. Xander pulled out a photograph from his pocket and held it in this light. The photograph was of a young, most likely in her earlier twenties, Chinese girl. She had long chestnut brown hair, which reached past her shoulders, and dark brown eyes. She was exceptionally beautiful. And she was heavily pregnant. 


	3. The Confession

CHAPTER THREE - THE CONFESSION  
  
The sofa was as uncomfortable as any sofa to sleep on. Something about the design of sofas makes them just a faction too small to fit the average sized human being Maybe the sofa manufacturers and the bed manufacturers are participates in some sort of worldwide conspiracy with chiropractors or maybe someone just made a mistake with a tape measure. Either way the sofa Xander slept on was uncomfortable as hell and his back testified to that. As he slowly lumbered himself onto two feet a piercing pain shot violently through his body. He instantly clutched at the lower part of his back as if his hand had magical healing plans usually only associated with myths and religious texts. Damn he hated sleeping on sofas. He promised himself that he would check into a motel tonight. He looked at his watch. It was early. He didn't like getting up early, who does? But he had too. He had much to do today. He rubbed his back until the pain subsidised and then made his way to the kitchen. Everything was exactly where he remembered it to be. He made himself the hearty breakfast made possible by the makers of Captain Crunch. He looked for the toy dinosaur that was promised on the back of the box but he couldn't find it. Obviously Dawn had beaten him to it. After clearing up, or the male equivalent, which is similar to simply putting dirty dishes by the sink, he looked at his watch again then quietly left the house. What he didn't see on his way out was the small object poking up from between the two sofa cushions. It was the photo.  
  
Xander walked for about half an hour to what could liberally be described as downtown Sunnydale until he came to an office block. He entered through a large glass double door beneath a gigantic white plastic sign that read in bright red lettering, 'Rent-a-Car'. The room he entered was dominated by a large blue wooden block at the far end of the room that stretched right across its width. Upon this blue block sat three computer screens and just before it stood a lonely post with 'wait here' written on it. The rest of the room was empty apart from the pictures of triangles on the other three walls and a small green plastic object that was supposed to be some sort of plant in what appeared to be the exact centre of the room. No one else was in the room, either behind the computer screens or in front of the blue block. Xander approached the block trying to make as much noise as possible including a few well-timed coughs and the occasional foot stomp. Just as he was running out of explainable ways of making noise and was almost upon the wooden block, a bright-eyed blonde girl appeared from a door to Xander's left, which was hidden behind an indent in the wall. She looked about Dawn's age, which in itself was not disturbing to Xander, but he found her very attractive, which conjured up confusing feeling when his brain informed him of the similarities between her and Dawn. He didn't delve any deeper since he kind of feared what he would find and plus it was very early in the morning.  
  
"Good morning, sir. How can I help you?" Said the blonde in an annoying chirpy voice.  
  
The attraction Xander felt towards her diminished significantly. "Hi. My name is Alexander Harris and I have a reservation for a car?" He did have a reservation and his name was Alexander Harris but for some reason he still posed it as a question.  
  
She nodded then began to type furiously at the computer to which she had position herself behind. The typing soon took on a peculiar pattern. There would be a short period of fast, almost fanatic typing followed by a longer one of single character typing and then a period of confused peering at the screen. This performance carried on for five minutes or so with no a word spoken between the two, although the girl did give Xander the occasional friendly smile between confused expressions, which he found enticing. There was something about her combination of absolute friendliness and naïve bewilderment that he found very appealing, though her tremendous figure didn't hurt either. Eventually she threw in the metaphorical towel and went back through the hidden door to return a few moments last with her manager. He appeared to be in his 40s and in the middle of some sort of life crisis. The way he tried to wear his clothes in a hip fashion led Xander to his conclusion as well as the ponytail and rescinding hairline. The manager typed a few things into the computer, stared at the screen then got the same confused look as the girl. He tried a few more buttons before looking up at Xander and saying, "I'm sorry Mr Harris but it appears as if we have mislaid your car."  
  
"Mislaid?" Asked a mystified Xander. "How do you mislay a car?"  
  
"Well, it seems we do not currently have it available for you to use today."  
  
"But I reserved it. I made a reservation.  
  
"Yes, we have your reservation."  
  
"Shouldn't that keep the car here?"  
  
"In theory, yes, but in this case, no."  
  
"What is the point of making a reservation if you don't reserve the car?"  
  
"Well, there looks like you have been some sort of glitch in communication between the taking of the reservation and the actual reserving of the car."  
  
"But I need that car. I have things to do."  
  
"We at Rent-a-Car understand your concerns Mr Harris and you do not need to worry. We are prepared to offer you an alternative vehicle if you so wish."  
  
The manager made a few taps on the keyboard. "Ah, it seems as if we only have one car available at the moment."  
  
"What car is that?" Asked Xander fearing the worse.  
  
"A BMW 5 Series."  
  
"Really?" Xander was shocked. This type of thing never happened to guy like him, at least not in real-life. If this was a movie or a television show then he could believe it could happen, well, not believe so much as accept. There had to be a problem, a glitch, a string attached somewhere. "Okay, what's the catch? Do I have to pay extra or something?"  
  
"No, sir. It was our mistake. We will incur the cost."  
  
"So I have a BMW 5 Series for the same price as the car I was originally going to get?"  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"I get to drive a BMW 5 Series?"  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
Maybe living on the hell-mouth had its perks. He hadn't thought helpful rent-a-car agencies were one of them but who was he to look a gift horse in the mouth? He never understood that phrase but it seemed somehow appropriate. At that moment Xander even considered reaching across the blue wooden block and kissing the manager but he decided against it. Maybe for a Jaguar X-Type but not for a BMW 5 Series, he did have some standards. Instead he asked for the keys and the location of the car in exchange for which he gave a security deposit. As soon as the keys landed in his head he could have sworn that he saw a twinkle of lust in the eyes of the young blonde girl. He might have stayed to make sure but he had more important things to do and anyway, he might be driving a BMW 5 Series now but he still was Xander.  
  
He drove his newly acquired flash car through the town, twice. He could get used to living the life of luxury. The stares people gave him and his car filled him with a sense of superiority. He knew that the car was just a loan but when in Rome and all that. Another phrase he didn't fully understand. After a few more slow cruises and admiring looks Xander made his way to his teenage hangout. Admittedly this hangout was slightly more morbid and filled with the stench of death than your usual teenage hangout but then it was a graveyard and his teen years hadn't been exactly normal. There is a large amount of difference between a graveyard during the day and one at night. During the day it has a feeling of sorrow, of loss and of mourning. The grass is somehow greener, the gravestones greyer and the flowers brighter. There are no shadows for evil to hide within, no danger of the undead raising from the newly dug graves to walk the earth as demon minions sacrificing humans to their animal hunger and there was no danger of walking into stupidity placed tombstones, something which he had, of course, never done. Xander made his way along the well-kept path past grave after grave after grave. There sure were a lot of graves in Sunnydale. Eventually he stopped in front of a simple grey tombstone. He knelt down and traced his hand across the lettering. It simply read, 'Anya. Gone but not forgotten'. "Hi, Anya. It's me, Xander. Sorry I haven't visited much but I've been away, in China. Doing building stuff, suffice to say it involved taking my shirt off and sweating a lot. You would have loved it. Anyway I just came to ask for your permission about something. I know we didn't get married and I know that was all my fault but still. I would like your permission for this. Yes, I know you don't want to waste time listening to me talk crap when you could be getting it on with Beethoven, Shakespeare and that guy from that deodorant commercial you liked, though I still don't think he's dead, but this is important. About three months ago my friend Dave, you know, the one with that thing on his face, well, Dave got involved with a Chinese guy called Kim Chang-Dang or something like that. We just used to call her Kim. Well, Kim was pregnant by this Chinese government official guy. I don't really know as Dave never told me exactly who was the father and I never asked. Anyway the father wasn't around and Dave got very friendly with Kim, I mean very friendly. He wanted to marry her and bring her back to the States and raise the kid as his own. At least that was the plan. There was an accident on the site. Dave was killed. Before he died he made me promise to look after Kim and the baby and do the thing he told me to do, I'll talk about that later. Anyway, despite me telling him that deathbed promises were so Hollywood he made me promised nevertheless. So I did. So for a couple of months I looked after Kim. I made sure she had everything I could possibly give her. Then about a month ago she gave birth while I was away on a dam project. There was a complication and she died too. She had some grandparents though and they took in the child. I gave them everything I intended to give Kim and told them they could contact me if they were ever in problem. Anyway the reason I'm telling you all this is because her death and Dave's death made me realise how short a time we have on this planet. I guess that being around death so much and on such a regular basis I kind of figured that I would either die early from a vampire or demon or I would live a long natural life. I never really thought that people could die just as suddenly from natural causes as supernatural. Well, I had told Dave everything, with obviously a few minor alternations like not mentioning the whole end of the world thing. I told him about you, Buffy, Dawn, Willow, everyone. He listened to everything I had to say and then told me exactly what he would do if he were me. That was a very Dave thing to do. He loved telling people what they should be doing with their lives. We gave him a hard time about it but really we had knack of telling someone exactly what they feared doing the most but was the best course of action for them. He was a hell of a guy. You would have liked him. He was your kind of person. Well, Dave told me what I think I have always knew to some extent and what you knew better than anyone, I love Buffy. He told me I should tell her how I feel. I owe it to myself and I owe it to Dave to see if there is something there. And after seeing what happened to him and Kim.Well, I have to seize the day, carpe that diem. I just wanted to tell you and sort of clear it with you. I know that there isn't anything you can exactly do to tell me if you approve or disapprove or for that matter if you have heard anything I have said but to be honest I hadn't really thought this through. Coming to see you was hard enough. But, well, it just felt right for me tell you."  
  
Xander knelt staring at the lettering on the grave nether moving or speaking. He knelt there buried deep within his thoughts until finally with a wipe of his eye he got up. He looked down at the grave, "Well, I won't keep you any longer. I hope you're happy wherever you are and I hope you're not doing anything I wouldn't do." And with that he left.  
  
Meanwhile back at the house Dawn had decided to talk Buffy. She had spent a very sleepless night thinking through everything that happened the night before and more importantly everything she had felt. Ever since she first saw Xander at the door something inside her changed. She didn't know exactly what had changed but she knew something had. Throughout the evening the feeling only grew. She had woken up in the middle of the night from the most vivid of dreams. In her dream she had been sitting in this green meadow paradise. To her left there was a small gently flowing stream teaming with fish of all colours of the rainbow. To her right there lay a small wood of the cutest trees she had ever seen populated with even cuter squirrels with big bright brown eyes. All around her there was rolling hill after rolling hill stretching as far as her eyes could see. It was paradise. It was her paradise. In the middle of all this she sat beneath a particularly large tree, which possessed lovely pink leaves that a tender wind softly plucked them from and trickled them down upon her and her companion. For she was not alone. Beside her sat Xander. They were talked but her dream-self couldn't quite work out what they were saying. Whatever it wants she seemed to be enjoying it a lot. She was acting like the love- struck Valley girl or one of the women from any period romantic novel. There was only one thing a dream like could mean. She wanted Xander. She knew that she had had a crush on him when she was younger but she thought she had grown out of those childish feelings. But suddenly she began to question everything. Was it a crush or was it something more? Was it part of a deep underlying love for Xander? Was he 'the one'? Those questions were what caused her the sleepless night and were the reason being wanting to talk to Buffy. After she was sure everyone else had gotten up to came out of her room. There was nothing she wanted less than being alone with Xander at the moment; she was too confused by her feelings. She came downstairs relieved not to see Xander lying on the sofa and even more relieved by Buffy telling her that him had left early in the morning. After finding out that Willow was also not in the house at the moment Dawn felt comfortable enough to broach the subject. "Buffy?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I love Xander." 


	4. The Convincing

Chapter Four - The Convincing  
  
"What do you mean you love Xander?" Shouted Buffy.  
  
"I mean I love him!"  
  
The two of them were standing eye to eye and were only inches apart. They were staring each other down as if they were two lionesses standing over a downed Zebra or as if they were taking part in an international staring contest with a grand prize of $50,000 and a trip for two to Barbados with a two-day stopover in the British Virgin Islands. It was a battle of wills with only their strength of character keeping them from turning away. Neither flinched. Eventually Buffy spoke, "How can you love Xander?"  
  
"I don't know." Replied Dawn. "I just do."  
  
"But you're just a child."  
  
"Am not!"  
  
"Are too!"  
  
A small smirk emerged on the face of Dawn much to the confusion of Buffy. "How old were you when you feel in love when Angel?"  
  
Across town Xander has steps out of the graveyard where he pauses to look at the sky. It was such a vibrant blue that he almost felt as if he could reach out and touch it. Somehow the sky reflected perfectly what was going on within his own head. No longer was his mind clouded by self-doubt. There was not even a whisper of fear. He had thought everything through, envisioned ever scenario and accepted all the risk. He was now at peace with himself. He was ready. So, with a gentle breeze in his face, he headed towards his new car and the rest of his life.  
  
Meanwhile back at the Summers' house the bomb has dropped. Buffy knew she had just been outflanked. The cavalry had got the message and was on the way. Why was she using so many military analogues? There must be something Freudianly significant about that. First things first, though. How can she dig her way out of this metaphorical hole and not lose the argument? She decided on the tried-on-tested argument, deny, deny, then confuse. "I wasn't that young. Anyway that was completely different. He was a vampire and I was the vampire slayer. We had that whole forbidden fruit and star-crossed lovers thing going on. Then there was the whole end of the world, rise of the Master incident. And I died. Oh and plus Angel was all broody and sexy."  
  
"Xander is.well, not broody but he's definitely sexy."  
  
"Xander's not sexy." Said Buffy as if the Pope had pronounced it after he'd been dipped in holy water and injected with truth serine.  
  
"What about those deep brown eyes? And that gorgeous half-smile thing he does? .Oh, then there's his body."  
  
"Okay!" Interrupted Buffy. "Never, ever, mentions Xander's body to me again."  
  
"But."  
  
"Ah! Never."  
  
"All right, fine. But you have to admit Xander is sexy."  
  
Buffy thought about this for a moment. "Even if he is, or you think he is, that doesn't mean you're in love with him. Remember you did have a crush on him."  
  
"I know, I know, but this is different. It's not like it's just about his hot bo.brown hair. It's everything. I love his everything. I love his smile, his personality, and his sense of humour. I love the little things. The way he scrunches up his nose whenever he tried your cooking. The way he buys cereals simply because of the toy inside. Hey way he cried at Bambi but didn't want us to see. They way he used to let me win at Monopoly. The way he used to sneak me pizza when Mum went of one of her healthy eating fads."  
  
"Or the way he only spoke Shakespearian English to me before an English Lit test." The girls paused, looked into the distance and collectively sighed. "Do you think he loves you back?" Buffy asked.  
  
"I don't know but there's only one way to find out."  
  
"An elaborate sting operation involving secret microphones?"  
  
"Err.no. I was thinking more along the lines of just asking him."  
  
"Oh. Right. Yeah, that would also work."  
  
The two of them stood sort of smiling at each other surrounded by an aura of mutual understanding and happiness. At that moment both could see the future and were contend with what they saw. "I can't believe it." Said Buffy. "My little sister and my best-friend, together." She smiled even broader and warmed smile.  
  
So did Dawn. "Yeah. Me and Xander." Just then a thought struck Dawn and her brow furrowed. "What if doesn't love me? What if he doesn't want me? What if he rejects me?"  
  
Buffy's gaze hardened and her smile disappeared. "Then I'll kill me." Then her tone lightened again. "Anyway he's not going to reject you. You're young, beautiful, intelligence, funny and making me extremely jealous." Dawn's smile also returned. There was another moment of silence. Then Buffy looked slightly confused, "Wait a minute. Xander doesn't like my cooking?"  
  
"Oops."  
  
The car Xander was driving stopped within sight of the Summers' house. This is it. No turning back now. Well he could.No! He mustn't. This is it. He is ready. He is ready. He can do it. Just tell her how you feel. That is all. Just say what you have always wanted to say. Think of Dave, think of Kim and think of your future, your future with her. This is it. He is ready. No turning back now. With that Xander stepped out of his car.  
  
The front door of the Summers' house opened and a figure stepped through. It looked around for a second then slowly made its way through the hall to the voices in the kitchen. However as it passed the living something in the corner of its eye caught its attention forcing it to double back. There was a small piece of white poking up from between the cushions of the sofa. The figure walked towards it, reached down and picked it up. It was a photo. A photo of a pregnant Chinese woman. Just then Dawn and Buffy entered the room from the kitchen. Before they did Dawn had called out in an eager voice, "Xander?" to no response. Then as they entered they saw who it was. "Willow?" Said a disappointed Dawn.  
  
Willow didn't notice. She was staring at the photo in shock. Some mild banter went back and forth between Buffy and Dawn over the former's recent attempt at a casserole until Buffy noticed what Willow was looking so intently at. "What's that?" She asked.  
  
No response. Willow continued to stare at the photo as if she hadn't heard the question then she suddenly realised that someone was saying to her, "What?"  
  
"I asked, what's that?" Repeated Buffy, this time pointing to the photograph as well.  
  
"A photo." Answered Willow without emotion.  
  
After a moment of hesitation Buffy asked, "Of what?"  
  
"Of a pregnant Chinese woman." Came the reply.  
  
Dawn was confused, "Why do you have the photo of a pregnant Chinese woman?"  
  
"It's not my photo. I found it in the sofa."  
  
"The sofa?" Said a baffled Buffy. "Why would it be in the.Oh."  
  
"Yeah." Said Willow in the same tone of realisation as Buffy had just said 'oh'.  
  
Dawn was still confused, "What? Oh, what?"  
  
Buffy turned towards her sister and said in as gentle a voice as she could muster, "Xander has just come back from China."  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"He spent last night on that sofa."  
  
"Yeah.Oh. So, that photo belongs to.?"  
  
"Xander."  
  
"Xander." Repeated Dawn in a solemn tone.  
  
"I'm sorry Dawn." Buffy said trying to comfort Dawn.  
  
"It's okay. It's probably for the best. How could someone like me love, Xander!"  
  
Unbeknownst to the three girls a figure had entered the room and was standing motionless by the door. Upon Dawn's exclamation both Buffy and Willow spun round towards the figure. It was Xander. 


	5. The Revelation

Chapter Five - The Revelation  
  
Xander stood motionless. It was as if time stood still for him in that moment. Everything was still. Movement ceased to exist. Yet Xander was fully aware. He saw everything, felt everything and knew everything for that brief split second in the living room of the Summers' house. He flashed back through the time he was in China. He experienced it all over again. And all this because of the photo he saw in Willow's hand. Then as soon as it had started it was over. Reality regained control. Time began to tick again. Movement returned from its exile. Xander was shocked back into existence as if he had been a gunshot victim in ER. Sensation hit him like a tidal wave. He saw Willow holding the photo then he saw Buffy saying something to him.  
  
".Have you been standing there?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"How long have you been standing there?"  
  
"Err.the door was open so I just came in."  
  
This answer confused everything including Xander but he was already pretty confused so it didn't bother him much. "Why do you have that?" He asked Willow.  
  
"It was in the sofa."  
  
Xander suddenly flashed back to last night and his twisting and turning. Crap, he thought.  
  
"Who is it, Xander?"  
  
He thought for a moment about whether he should tell them the story behind the photo. That moment didn't last very long. "Okay. Do you want me to start from the beginning or the good bit?"  
  
The three girls looked at each other then Buffy answered for them, "The beginning."  
  
So he started at the beginning, carried on to the middle, passing the good bit, then finished at the end. After he had said everything that could be said on the matter he laid back in the chair he was now sitting in and awaited reaction. No reaction came. The three girls were speechless. They had no speech. They just sat there, for they were also now seated, with a dumbfounded look on their faces. They couldn't think of anything to say, they were still digesting the story that had just been told to them. Occasionally one would look as if they were about to say something, causing Xander to lean forward in his chair, but then they would go back to looking dumbfounded, at which point Xander would returned to his original position. This carried on for about four to five minutes. That may not sound like a lot of time to you but you should try it some time. Anyway Xander found the silence almost unbearable as any red blooded male would. Eventually he snapped. "Say something! Oh for the love of God say something! I can't stand the silence. Someone say something! Anything! I don't care what. Just someone say something!"  
  
Silence. A vein begin to grow in Xander' neck. His eyes started to bulge and his mouth developed a tiny tick. "Say something!"  
  
By now the three girls were beginning to get a little worried, both for themselves and for Xander's sanity. However before one of them could say something Xander stormed off and into the dining room. This left the girls looking at each other more confused than ever.  
  
"I think he's carried." Said Willow.  
  
"He's got a lot on his mind." Said Buffy. "I mean you heard his story."  
  
"That story was incredible." Chimed in Dawn. "Especially that good bit in the middle."  
  
The other two girls nodded in agreement.  
  
"I think one of us should go and see if he's okay. You know, not overcrowd him."  
  
"I'll go." Said Dawn also before Buffy had finished.  
  
And almost before Dawn had finished Buffy had replied, "Not you."  
  
Buffy and Dawn simultaneously turned towards Willow. She looked back at them with a 'what, me?' look on her face. "What, me?" She said. "Oh, all right."  
  
"Wait!" Shouted Dawn causing Willow to freeze in the uncomfortable position between sitting and seating. "Buffy should."  
  
"Why, Buffy?" Asked Willow.  
  
"Yeah, why me?" Buffy also asked.  
  
"Because she's the Slayer." Said Dawn as if this was reason enough. Then she leaned towards her sister, for they were seating next to each other, and whispered, "And you can tell him I love him."  
  
A look of terror gripped Buffy. "Do you really think this is the right time?" She whispered back.  
  
"If you don't I'll tell him what you did to his Green Goblin comic collection."  
  
Buffy instantly sprang to her feet. "I should go. I am the Slayer. This is a Slayer situation. Which means I should go because I'm the Slayer. So, I should go. Okay, going is what I'm doing." Then she went. This left Willow bewildered at what she had just witnessed.  
  
Xander stood by the window in the dining room but he wasn't looking out of it because the curtains were closed and he had not bothered to open them. He saw Buffy enter. "Took you long enough."  
  
"Yeah, sorry about that. Your storming out kind of took us by surprise."  
  
"I did not storm out. I.I.I did something far more masculine than storming out which I cannot currently think of at the moment."  
  
"Oh, right. You didn't storm out. Got it."  
  
"Anyway, shouldn't you be asking if I'm okay?"  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
There was a moment of uncomfortable silence. Then Xander relaxed his tense posture and said in a surprisingly gentle tone, "Look Buffy I have something to tell you."  
  
"I have something to tell you."  
  
"Oh. Right. Err.you first."  
  
"Why should I go first?"  
  
"Women always go first and." It was at this moment that Xander saw the terrifyingly 'pissed off' look in Buffy's eyes. "And I'll go first."  
  
He paused in an attempt to compose himself, failing miserably. "Well, it's like this.this is how it is..Um.Well, you see, there was. Um.okay. Here it is. This is it..The thing is.Um, yeah."  
  
"Xander?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Take a deep breath."  
  
He took a deep breath.  
  
"And tell me what it is."  
  
"I love you."  
  
This was not what Buffy had been expecting. To say that she was shocked would, perhaps, be the biggest understatement since the innkeeper said to Mary 'I'd watch that kid of yours. He looks like trouble'.  
  
Just then a brick smashed through the window hitting Xander in the back. He fell to the ground. Buffy jumped over him and pulled back the curtains to reveal a group of fifty vampires standing outside her house in bright sunshine. 


	6. The Red Stuff

Chapter Six - The Red Stuff  
  
"Slayer!" Shouted the lead vampire of the pack of twenty. He is tall, dark, and handsome, and dead. He's wearing what appears to be a very expensive, possibly Italian-made, suit with a reservoir dog-style black tie. If you had met him on the street you would have thought he's a merchant banker or some other job involving financial jargon and unbelievable outright greed. You probably wouldn't have given him a second look, why would you? You couldn't have known his true identity, but Buffy knew. She stared at him through eyes tinted with hatred.  
  
In the corner of her eye she saw movement. It's Xander. She turns round and moves to help him but he brushes her off. He manages to haul himself off the floor and to a standing position albeit with amble support from the wall. He blinks a few times, shakes his head slightly then brings his hand to the back of his head where the brick hit. His hand returns with a vibrant red covering the fingers. Both Buffy and Xander stood staring at the blood then their eyes made contact. Buffy's gaze is full of concern whereas Xander's has disbelief about it.  
  
"Ouch!" Says Xander with emphasis.  
  
Then the door to Buffy's left burst open. Willow and Dawn rush in. They are confronted with the image of a brick on the floor in front of them surrounded by broken glass, a window with a large hole in the middle of it and Xander holding out a hand dripping with blood.  
  
Willow's hands jump to her mouth, "Oh my God." She murmurs.  
  
A shock engulfs Dawn's face leaving her mouth open but no sound coming out.  
  
"Slayer!"  
  
The shout causes all four to spin round and look out the window. The shock on Dawn's face turns into fear and is matched by a similar transformation from Willow.  
  
Outside the lead vampire sees the face he had been waiting to see staring out of the broken window. He grins like a Cheshire cat. "This is a warning." He shouts. "You have one week to leave town. One week." He holds up his index finger.  
  
"Or what?" Comes the reply from behind the window.  
  
"Or else!"  
  
There is a moment of silence. Nothing moves, not even a mouse. Then from inside the house there comes another response, "Or else what?"  
  
The lead vampire is clearly annoyed by this response. He shouts back as if he had just been asked an irritatingly simple question by a five-year old. "Or else what? What do you think? We'll kill you! We'll cut your throat, break your neck, rip out your heart, slice you in two, err." He stumbles for words. One of the vampires directly behind him whispers something in his ear. "We'll rip out your brain through your nose and feed it to Gary here."  
  
Gary grins.  
  
"Basically," Continued the lead vampire. "By the end of the week the only way you are going to remain here is if you are dead. Got it?"  
  
"Yeah. Got it."  
  
"Okay, then. Good." The lead vampire turns to walk away but the group of vampire behind him don't move. They just continue to stand facing the house. Eventually after a few uncomfortable seconds and a lot of wild arm movements by the lead vampire a path emerges through the crowd. With a little shoving and general aggression the lead vampire gets through the group and walks off with renewed dignity. The other vampires wait for him to get through then follow on behind. After two minutes they are completely gone and the street returns to normal as if nothing had happened.  
  
Inside the house Buffy stares out the window making sure all the vampires leave, flanked on both sides by Willow and Dawn. When she is satisfied they have gone she turns round only to jump back in shock at the closeness of the other two girls. As she jumps back she instinctively puts out her hand unfortunately she puts it right onto the windowsill full of broken glass. She cries out in pain as the glass is shoved into her skin by the weight of her body. She slowly brings her hand into view only to see small drops of red suddenly turn into a flowing tickle.  
  
"That looks bad." Says a distressed Willow, taking Buffy's hand in her own.  
  
Buffy quickly withdraws it, "It's nothing." She insists.  
  
Willow looks squarely at her in the eye and says with authority, "You need to go to the hospital."  
  
But before Buffy can protest a loud cough draws the attention of the three girls behind them and to Xander. "Ahem." He says emphasising the blood on his hand while pointing to the wound in the back of his head.  
  
A wave of concern flows through the girls as they converge on Xander. "All right, all right. Enough" He says cynically. "Let's go."  
  
He leads them outside. As they emerge into the bright sunshine all four simultaneously shield their eyes, well, it takes Buffy slightly longer than the rest as she has to switch hands. Dawn quickly scans the drive only to discover no car sat there. "Where's your car?" She asks Xander.  
  
"Over there." He says pointing to the really expensive silver car across the street.  
  
"No, seriously, where's your car?" Dawn repeats.  
  
Xander looks back at her, "Over there." He says again pointing. Then he walks over towards the car. The three girls stood motionless for a second before reluctantly following. Xander pulls out the keys and pushes the button to open the car, which it duly does. The girls exchange a glance of disbelief. Xander goes to get in the driver's side but Willow stops him, "Should you really be driving?" She asks.  
  
"I'm fine." He replies dismissively.  
  
Willow holds up two fingers, "How many?" She asks.  
  
Xander tries to concentrate but his eyes kind of glaze over. He gives up. "Yeah, okay." He says handing Willow the keys. She gets in. Xander walks round to the front passenger seat to find Buffy opening the door. He indicates for her to get in the back seat. "But I'm bleeding." She protests indicating her hand.  
  
Xander looks down with disdain. "I'm bleeding more." He says indicating his head.  
  
Buffy concedes and gets in the back with Dawn. Willow turns on the engine then looks down worriedly at the gearbox. She then looks up to see Xander anxiously looking back at her. She gives him a sheepish grin. Then she crunches the gears. "Oops." She crunches them again. Xander is looking increasingly apprehensive. "Willow.?" Before he can finish she finds first gear and the car is moving. Willow smiles triumphantly at Xander. He gives her an unimpressed look, which kind of punctuates her glee. He then draws down his window and sticks his head out of the car.  
  
"What are you doing?" Asks an alarmed Dawn.  
  
"I don't want to bleed on the car." Says Xander as if it is obvious.  
  
This answer dumbfounds everyone causing a collective stunned silence. This is broken by the sound of an electric window whirring itself down. Dawn and Willow turn to the culprit, Buffy. Xander tries to turn to see but can't work out a way to get his head to move that way. Buffy responds to these looks with a blank, "What?"  
  
Willow returns to looking at the road only to discover the car has veered slightly to the left. It is now in directly in the path of an oncoming car. A very fast oncoming car. 


	7. The Car Crash Conclusion

CHAPTER SEVEN - THE CAR CRASH CONCLUSION  
  
In a bright flash of light Willow was transported back through her life. She relived past experiences as if they were happening for the first time. The sights, the smells, the sounds, they were all real. Then they were gone and she was back in reality. She saw the car speeding towards her and she slammed on the brakes and yanked the steering wheel. The driver of the other car did the same. There followed a few seconds of sublime silent ballet as the two cars spun in an orchestrated display worthy of an Olympic gold. Dust bellowed up as the tires spun on the side of the road engulfing the spectacle. Then it was over.  
  
Slowly the dust settled to reveal the two cars staring at each other in the middle of the road with only a hairbreadth apart. A door opened and a dazed Xander stepped out and stood clutching the back of his head. He moved to the front of the car seeing the tiny gap of air between them. He looked back at Willow and the other girls, "Everyone okay?" He asked.  
  
Willow checked herself for blood or pain but found none. She looked back at Buffy and Dawn who were doing the same. They also found none, or in Buffy's case nothing new, and Willow shouted back to Xander, "We're fine."  
  
They all turned their attention to the other car. It was a small red Ford, the kind of car a professional woman gets because it looks cute. The sun shone directly onto its windscreen stopping Xander from getting a look at the driver. "Are you okay?" He called out to the car. There was no response. He turned back to his car and shrugged. Willow motioned him forward. He looked confused. She motioned him forward again. He looked confused again. She wound down her window, stuck her head out and said in a rather annoyed tone, "Go see if he's okay."  
  
"Oh." Said Xander as if he had just worked out who hit Colonel Muster over the head with the candlestick in the drawing room. He didn't move however. He just stood there. Willow became exasperated and motioned him forward again. Xander looked confused for a split-second before realisation hit him and he began walking towards the other car.  
  
Inside his car Willow turned round to face the back and said, "You know, I love Xander but he sure can be incredibly stupid sometimes." She looked for a smile of agreement from Buffy but there wasn't one there. That's strange, she thought. Buffy is always ready to make fun of Xander, in fact, she's usually the first one to do so. Maybe her hand is hurting more than she is letting on. Willow turned her attention to Dawn for the elusive agreement she sought. This is very strange. Dawn looks as if I have stolen her favourite blue top, which I haven't. It's just resting in my wardrobe. Honest. Anyway, she doesn't know about that. Why is she looking annoyed? Maybe she does know.  
  
Xander shielded his eyes from the bright reflective glare on the car. He approached cautiously. He didn't know why. He had no reason to think that there was anything else but an injured driver in that car but then in Sunnydale you learn to expect the unexpected. He inched closer to the car. He could feel his shirt becoming damp from sweat. Damn heat. His heart began to beat loudly. Thud, thud, thud. That can't be good. Thud, thud, thud. He inched closer. The reflection of light on the car was blindly. He had to squint hard just to see anything. His heart began beating louder and louder. It was at this point that his mind flashed back to just before the brick hit him in the back of his head. He saw Buffy. He heard himself say, 'I love you'. Thud, thud, thud. His heartbeat quickened further. Blood rushed to his face. His cheeks became bright red. He could feel the heat they produced. Sweat dripped down his body. He was now at the side of the car. He leaned in on the window. He cupped his hand round his eyes and looked in. It was Giles. 


	8. The George Michael Song

CHAPTER EIGHT - THE GEORGE MICHAEL SONG  
  
The rain poured down so hard that one could be forgiven for believing it was a hailstorm. The landscape was bleak with nothing but a few trees for miles around. The ground underfoot was beginning to get swampy from all the water. A small green hill rose majesty in the middle of the field and it was this hill that the woman was approaching. She was covered head-to- toe in warm clothing but despite this there was something inherently flirtatious about the way she moved. Her boots were increasingly being bogged down by the mud and probably would have slipped off by now if they hadn't been so tightly fastened. The woman approached the hill and began to make her way up it. After a few falls and plenty of off-colour language she reached the top. The wind suddenly picked up and beat fiercely against her exposed face. The woman pulled out a map and tried as best she could, despite the wind and the rain, to work out where she was. After a few moment of looking around and off-colour language she decided that where she was right now was where she was supposed to be. She pulled the head of a spade from behind her back where she had been carrying it like a backpack and screwed it onto the wooden pole she had been using as a walking stick. She then took the spade and planted it firmly into the ground and began to dig. Eventually after much effort and off-colour language the head of the spade made the metallic thud that she had been waiting for. Eagerly she dug around what appeared to be a chest of some kind. She lifted it out of the hole with much effort and pulled an ancient-looking key from her inside coat pocket. She carefully placed the key into the lock and gingerly turned it. The lock clicked. She lifted the chest open and was basked in a shower of golden light. She sat in the mud, the wind and the rain, staring intently at the golden contents of the chest. Then a small hint of smile emerged at the side of her blood red lips. This quickly turned into a smirk and then into a fully-fledged grin. She shut the chest, replaced the key in her coat pocket and pulled out a mobile phone. After a few buttons had been pressed she held it to the side of her face. "Giles?" She called into it. "I've got it."  
  
The voice at the other end said after a moment's pause, "Good. Well done Faith."  
  
"Hey Giles?" "Yes?" "Check out the connection of this baby. I'm in the middle of the English countryside, which sucks by the way; it's raining like hell and I can still hear you perfectly in California. I told you that extra 400 bucks wasn't wasted money."  
  
"No. It was 400 wasted pounds. My 400 wasted pounds. You could have called from a payphone."  
  
Faith looked around at the bleak desolate countryside, which showed not even a hint of anything remotely resembling civilisation. She then proceeded to shout some very decidedly off-colour language into the phone. After a couple of minutes she was satisfied that she had been able to sufficiently get her point across so she stopped. There was, however, no noise at the other end of the phone. "Giles?" No response. Faith became slightly worried. "Giles?" Still no response. There was no dial tone so he hasn't hang up, she thought. Maybe something has happened. Maybe she lost her signal. No, there wouldn't be a dial tone and plus this phone was really expensive. "Giles?" Still nothing. She tired to listen for any noise to suggest what was going on. The rain and the wind made this task practically impossible but then she is a Slayer. She used everything she had and focused on he noise at the other end of the phone. Nothing. She was about to give up when there was a loud shattering noise as someone had broken a piece of glass. "Giles? Giles?" She was shouting now. There was an agonising moment of silence in which the raindrops fell in slow motion ton the extent that she could see individual ones. Then there was a voice, "Hello?" It was Xander. 


	9. Giles and the Hospital

Giles and the Hospital 

            Giles lay back in his hospital bed going through the deep recesses of his memory looking for the events that led up to his current heavily bandaged-self. The large amount of painkillers flowing through his veins didn't help but then neither would screaming like a lunatic who has just been told that fish can't talk let alone discuss macroeconomic policies designed to give genuine relief to the poor whilst maintaining low levels of taxation. His mind flashed him back to a bright shining light. Had he died then been brought back to life on the operating table? Had he been on the verge of entry to the glorious kingdom of heaven for an eternity of happiness? His mind continued the flashback to reveal the source of the light as the sun reflecting off a very shiny and expensive looking car. Oh, well. He probably would have got bored. Eternity is a very long time after all. He hoped he had banged up that rich kid's car. You know, done some serious damage to it. Damn, he hated spoilt brats racing around with not a care in the world. He missed being young.

            Buffy entered the room, saw Giles dazedly smiling and thought the drugs must be working. "Hey." She said stepping forward to the edge of his bed. 

"Oh." Giles snapped back to reality. "Hello Buffy."

"Are you okay?" They both looked at the various bleeping machines he was hooked up too. "Stupid question."

"I'm fine." He said reassuringly. 

Buffy smiled with relief. 

Giles looked down to her bandaged hand. Buffy saw him looking and instinctively clutched her damaged hand. "It's nothing. A little bit of glass, that's all. Xander's much worse."

"What's wrong with Xander?"

"He got a brick in the back of his head. 23 stitches and a concussion. Doctor said he would be good as new in a few weeks. He's in a room down the hall."

"What happened? Vampire?"

"Yeah. But…" Buffy hesitated as if she thought Giles might laugh at her if she continued. "They were daylight vamps."

"Daylight vamps?"

"Yeah."

Giles went into deep thought mode and said, almost to himself, "So, it has begun."

After a moment's pause, during which Buffy looked confusingly at him, she said, "Err…what's begun?"

"Faith hasn't called you?" Said Giles in surprise.

"Nope."

"I knew that mobile wasn't any good."

"What?"

"Oh. Nothing. So, you don't know anything about the coming of Bastook?"

Buffy shook her head.

"The ritual of deliverance?"

Buffy made a no type sound. Kind of a cross between a baby refusing to play peep-a-boo and an Englishmen trying to buy a loaf of bread from a French bakery that only sells baguettes. 

"The chest of Hadiz?"

"This feels like my English exam. Not that I didn't read the book. I did. It's just…"

"Buffy this is slightly more important that your English exam. This is the end of the world."

"That's what I told Mr Greenway."


	10. Xander and the Hospital

Xander and the Hospital 

            In a hospital bed down the hall from Giles lay a young, newly-shaven, man with a large dressing round his head. Xander was just waking up from the effects of the anaesthetic. His eyes didn't want to focus. All he saw was a misty cloud of colour. After a few blinks his eyes began to work and the blurry images before him sharpened to reveal Willow standing by the window and Dawn sitting on a chair by the left side of his bed. That's his left on the opposite side of the room to the window and in front of the door, which currently was closed. Willow had her back to Xander and so didn't notice his newly acquired consciousness but Dawn, who had been counting the number of crumbs under the bed, looked up and involuntary emitted a squeal of job. She leapt forward and engulfed the surprised Xander in a hug causing him to emit his own sound akin to a man being hit in the crown jewels by a particularly well-struck cricket ball, or baseball for our American cousins. "Okay Dawnie." He said. 

Dawn didn't move. "Okay Dawn." He said again this time slightly pushing her again in an attempt to get enough room to breathe.

She got the message. "Oh, sorry." And reluctantly dragged herself off him.

Meanwhile Willow had moved away from the window and stood by Xander's bed with tears in her eyes. They shared a look in which neither spoke but much was said. Then she threw herself at him and clutched him in an embrace tight enough to kill a small vole. He emitted his sound again. After a few seconds of embrace Xander gently said, "Okay, Willow."

She relinquished her grip and half-apologising went back to standing by his bed. 

Xander was confronted with the image of two teary-eyed girls compassionately looking down upon him. Actually Dawn had something slightly more than compassion in her eyes and that kind of freaked him out. He couldn't make eye contact with her and didn't quite know why. "So, am I going to be okay?" He said trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"Yeah." Said Willow. "The doctors said you are going to be fine. 23 stitches and a concussion, that's all."

"23 stitches? Cool." Xander said feeling the back of his head.

The two girls smiled. There was silence. Not an uncomfortable silence more one out of relief. Xander got suspicious, "Did something happen during the operation?"

Both girls suddenly found something more important to look at than him. Willow chose a mysterious brown patch on the ceiling and Dawn discovered three holes drilled into the wall about a foot off the floor. "Did something happen during the operation?" Xander repeated with more urgency.

Willow looked at Dawn and Dawn looked at Willow then they both looked at Xander. "Well." Said Willow. "There was a problem."

"Yeah, a problem." Added Dawn.

"A problem?" Said Xander, his eyes widening. "What kind of problem?"

"Well." Said Willow again. "Um…you see…here's the thing…"

"You died." Blurted out Dawn. 

"I died!?!" Xander kind of shrieked 

"Yeah." Whispered Willow in as gentle a voice as she could manage at the time.

"I died!?!" Said Xander in even more of shrieked.

"But only for a few seconds." Said Dawn. 

"I died!?!"

"They brought you back right away." Continued Dawn.

"I was dead?"

"They said it wouldn't effect you. You know, permanently."

Willow sat down on the bed and softly stroked Xander's arm. "Xander…?" 

"Let me get this straight. I died?"

"Just a little." Said Willow.

At this point the door opened and Buffy stepped in. She saw that Xander was awake and produced a sound very similar to Dawn's squeal. She raced across the room and flung herself at him, holding him in a clinch of Slayer proportion. Xander didn't make a sound. After a few moments he whispered very quietly into her ear, "I died."

She whispered back, "I know."

Then she released him from her grip and stood next to Dawn. There was silence.

"At least you can't use that 'I died' excuse to avoid cleaning the dishes." He said looking straight at Buffy.

She smiled. "I died twice."

Xander put a hand up to his face and noticed his lack of facial hair. "Hey, who shaved my beard?" 

"Err…that was a collective decision." Said Willow.


	11. Xander And The Full Bladder

Chapter 11 - Xander And The Full Bladder 

Xander opened his eyes. No one was there. He felt kind of disappointed. I mean he thought at least one of them could have stayed at his bedside all night. Wasn't he worth losing sleep over? On the other hand maybe they had just popped out to the bathroom. Man, did he need the bathroom. He tried to get up but the pain soon stopped that. He thought about using the tube but he still had his dignity. He'd wait; best not even think about it. 

Maybe the vampires had come and there had been a really cool battle with bodies flying left, right and centre. Maybe he missed all the violence, the pain, and the suffering. Maybe he…nah. He never missed the violence, the pain, and the suffering. In fact, it actively sought him out. No, the vampires hadn't come. What else could explain it then? Maybe they were in Giles's room having big meeting without him. That sounded plausible. Maybe they were deciding how to defeat the big bad. Maybe Faith had arrived with that box she had talked about. Hmm…Faith. No, you like Buffy. But still…no, Buffy. Focus, man. Wait a minute. Maybe they had all run off to Mexico. No, that was silly. Maybe they had all gone home for a shower and in a cloud of foam someone's hand had strayed onto someone else's thigh and sparks started to fly and ...No, I said focus! Maybe their eyes met as they reached for the soap and…Damn it! Damn lesbians for being so God damn hot!

"What's that about lesbians?" Willow asked as she entered the room with Dawn and Buffy following behind her.

Xander's eyes flared open with shock but he soon recovered composure. "Where have you lot been? No one was here to wake me up in case anything good happened." He demanded.

Buffy pointed out of the door, "With Giles."

Xander sat up and pointed an accusing finger at the three of them, "I knew it!"

Dawn brushed a stray hair from her face and smiled, "Except me. I was in the bathroom."

Xander continued to point, though less accusingly, "I also knew that!"

Willow gave him her usual playful yet uncompromising stare, "What do you want? A cookie?"

He thought about this for a moment then responded, "Well, yes actually. I've feeling a bit hungry."

Willow's stare softened and her eyes glinted with honesty, "Well you can't. The doctor said no food for twenty-four hours and plus Buffy ate the cookie."

Buffy's eyes opened wide at this and indignity invaded her voice, "I did not…. Okay, I did. But it wasn't my fault. It was so tastefully delightfully scrumptious." She stopped as she realised everyone was staring at her. "…What? Oh, sorry Xander. Didn't mean to make you drool."

Xander's jaw returned from its dropped position and he quickly wiped the speck of drool from his mouth. "I wasn't drooling about the cook…err…yes, I was. I was drooling about the cookie and nothing else. Also since when do you use the word scrumptious?"

Buffy shrugged her shoulders, "I blame Giles. He make me English bad."

Willow walked up and sat on the edge of Xander's bed. "Actually something did happen while you were asleep. Faith has arrived."

Xander gazed into the distance, "Hmm…Faith."

A fiercest entered Willow's voice, "Xander?"

He was brought out of his daydream, "What? I wasn't drooling."

Willow furrowed her brow in confusion, "Err…I was going to ask you if you were feeling up to a trip outside."

Xander acted as if he had just been caught with his hand covered in red paint, "Oh…um…yes, yes I am. But first I have a little matter to take care of."

The three girls stood waiting for him to take care of the little matter he spoke of but he didn't move.

"Well…?" Asked Buffy.

A broad smile of satisfaction emerged across Xander's face, "I'm done."

The three of them stared at each other and shrugged their shoulders in puzzlement. 

After a piece of careful manoeuvring and occasional swearing Xander was in the wheelchair and being wheeled out of the room and to freedom, well, not so much freedom as the hospital garden. 

He was being pushed by Willow and just as he was out of his room she lent down to his right ear and whispered, "So, what's this about lesbians?"

"Ah. About that…"


	12. A Lifting Experience

Chapter 12 – A Lifting Experience 

****

The elevator gave a reassuring ding upon landing on the thirteen floor. The doors opened to reveal an average-looking hospital corridor with the familiar smell of disinfectant and vomit. A doctor in a stained white coat entered with an attractive young Hispanic nurse.

"What do you mean, no?" Asked the doctor to the nurse.

"I mean no." Replied the nurse.

They seem to not notice the four other people in the cramped tin box who ever desperately trying to appear as if they weren't listening despite the fact that it was impossible not too.

"I thought you said you liked her?" Asked the doctor.

The nurse turned to face him with anger in her eyes, "I did until I found out she was your former fiancé. A fact that you did not mention to me, which by the way we will be discussing in further detail at some point in the future I can assure you."

"Okay, she was my fiancé five years ago. So what? That doesn't change anything between us."

"Of course it does."

"What?"

"What?"

"What does it change between us?"

The nurse stumbled over herself as she frantically searched for the appropriate words to form a sentence that could reasonably be called a response. "Yeah, well, she was your fiancé. Plus she is, like, dead drop gorgeous."

The doctor tried his hardest to appear innocent, "Is she?"

From his wheelchair Xander struggled just as hard to suppress a smirk.

"Is she?" Exploded the nurse. "She is six foot plus, blonde as a Swede, leggy as a giraffe, and has massive…"

The doctor quickly interrupted her suddenly becoming aware of the silent audience. "Meera." He gestured to the audience with his eyes and the nurse seemed to understand. She returned to facing the front of the elevator and said no more.

The elevator gave another reassuring ping to signal it had reached the first floor. Buffy made the apologies as they wheeled Xander out forcing the doctor and the nurse up against the opposite sides of the tin box. As soon as they negotiated their exit the doors shut together. They all looked at each other with a mixture of confusion and excitement. Xander was the first to speak, "Okay. That was weird."

They all rushed to agree.

He continued, "Why would he choose a leggy blonde over her? She was hot!"

Perhaps the only other way he could have achieved the silence he did would have been if he revealed he was, in fact, the second gunman on the grassy knoll in Dallas on November 22nd, 1963, and that his employer was the Coca Cola Company.

Xander didn't understand why absolute silence had greeted his last observation. "What?" He said. "She was."

Willow rolled her eyes and started to push his wheelchair in the direction of a large set of double doors with the word 'exit' written above in green writing. "Oh, Xander. You just don't understand women, do you?"

Xander looked as if he was about to disagree with this statement but he relaxed back in his chair. "Yeah, I know."

The three women strode through the double doors behind the slouching seated figure of Xander. As they passed through they were hit by a bright burst of sunshine. The women all instantly put on fashionable shades as if enacting a homage to the Blues Brothers. Xander, noticing this, complained, "Hey! Why didn't I get any shades?" 

No one answered him; they were too busy imagining how cool they must look. After a few second of that the group continued moving forward into the well-landscaped garden.

"No, seriously, why didn't I get any shades?"


	13. Birds Sitting On The Fence Of Suburbia

Chapter 13 – Birds on the Fence of Suburbia 

****

The sun beat down creating an atmosphere of oppressive heat that would force even a particularly hardened lizard to install air-conditioning. In the middle of the hospital's sculptured garden sat a twenty-foot stone foundation that showered a small circular pathway around it with a fine cloud of much-needed moisture. Rainbows could be seen in the mist of cool water. Beside the foundation was a group of people devising a plan to save the world of unimaginable disaster.

"So, you're saying that if we lower the work surface Luigi will still be able to make pizzas?"

On the other side of the foundation another group of people was engaged in the minor pursuit of gossip, specifically gossip about a certain doctor and nurse.

"She is so right." Commented Dawn. "He should have told her about the fiancé."

"Ex-fiancé." Corrected Xander.

"Whatever." Continued Dawn. "He should have told her."

"Dawnie." Said Xander patronisingly. "Grown-up relationships are much more complex than that."

"How would you know?" Asked Buffy. "And he should have told her."

Willow nodded in agreement.

Xander looked desperately at Giles in the hope of some male solidarity. "I don't think I have ever cared less about anything in my entire life." Came the response from Giles.

Faith injected herself into the conversation, "So, was he a grade A piece of ass?"

"Well, he certainly had something about…" Xander stopped himself. "You were probably asking one of them." He said pointing to Willow and Buffy. Faith nodded as if she was at a camp for "special" children.

Willow gave Xander a strange look then focused on Faith. "I'm no expert on the subject but I thought he was really cute. Noah Wyle cute."

Faith nodded then turned to Buffy, "B?"

Buffy had been staring though her rather fashionable sunglasses at Xander. A procession of romantically inclined thoughts raced through her mind. She was so lost within this sugarcoated world that she barely heard Faith's question. It had to be repeated until she eventually uttered, "Huh?"

Giles finally broke. "Do you think it might be possible for us to discuss the slight problem of the impending Armageddon?" He asked dryly.

The group looked at each other and they all made sounds of agreement. This ranged from the traditional 'okay' to the more modern 'uh-huh' to positively bizarre 'I didn't get any shades'.


End file.
